Sherry Gaba, LCSW, a psychotherapist and life, love, and recovery coach, is featured on Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of The Law of Sobriety, which uses the Law of Attraction to help people recover from addiction. Get your free meditation audio MP3 How to Attract Positive Energy and to learn more about Wake Up Recovery at http://www.wakeuprecovery.com/getonlist/
. She is also a contributor to Chicken Soup for the Soul: Tough Times, Tough People and Conscious Entrepreneurs, and to several e-books: Empowerment Manual: Finding Purpose With Intention, Filling the Empty Heart: 5 Keys to Transforming Love Addiction. The e-books Relapse Prevention and Eliminate Limiting Beliefs can be downloaded free of charge at www.sherrygaba.com. Contact Sherry for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages, and speaking engagements.
To many people the idea of a love addiction seems far fetched or something that is just made up to explain irrational behaviors. However, love addiction is not a new concept. Early literature and history are full of references to people, often very powerful and famous people, which allowed their dependence on another person to cause their downfall or even death. Why some people become so dependent on another is largely a factor of emotional needs that are not met through positive relationships but are somehow met through negative and destructive relationships.
Love addiction is more than just an emotional need that isn’t met, there is a potential for serious injury and even death because of this behavior. When a person continues in a relationship that is abusive, either physically or mentally, there is a very real danger. Women and men are abused in relationships, and unfortunately death by an intimate partner is a very real concern in today’s society. Knowing when love has become an addiction starts by asking the following questions:
1. Have I been hurt, physically or emotionally, by my partner?
2. Do I make excuses or rationalize the abuse?
3. Do I tend to choose partners that are emotionally distant or do I have a history of being in abusive relationships?
4. Is there a give and take in this relationship or do I give and give but seem to get nothing or very little in response?
5. Can I leave this relationship and move on in my life?
Answering these questions honestly is the first step in determining if you may have an addiction to love that is potentially harmful or dangerous. Most people need help with this very serious issue and greatly benefit from talking with a therapist or counselor that specializes in addictions and addiction recovery.